Showing posts with label funny. Show all posts
Showing posts with label funny. Show all posts

3.8.25

Wax Tablets & Ramen Dreams: Horace’s Hustle Through School in Ancient Rome

An engraving of the Roman poet Horace with a circular frame with curious faces. Horace's name is inscribed with his Latin spelling "Horatius".
Horace
In this post, I trace Horace’s wax‐tablet hustle and Cicero’s scroll‐toting swagger to today’s laptop lectures and TikTok chats, proving student life — status symbols, gossip, and big dreams — still beats with the same ancient pulse.

Why Horace’s Father Snubbed Rome’s Elite Prep School

“He wouldn’t send me to Flavius’ school, where the fine lads —sons of proud centurions — strode in with satchels and tablets on their left arms, eight coins of tuition clasped in hand on each Ides.”

—Horace, Satires 1.6. 75-79 

From Clay Tablets to Campus Chats: Student Life in Ancient Rome vs. Today

In ancient Rome, heading to school meant carrying a tablet — and no, not the digital kind. Roman poet Horace dryly noted that wealthy students strolled to class with wax tablets and leather satchels, ready to pay their monthly tuition. Horace, however, didn’t come from money. His father, a freed slave, scraped together enough to send him to Rome for a proper education. Think of Horace as the scholarship kid living on the ancient equivalent of ramen and PB&J, while his classmates showed up with nicer gear and more lunch money.

Cicero, by contrast, grew up in an upper-middle-class family and received a top-tier education in literature, philosophy, and rhetoric. He likely had the finest tablets, an arsenal of scrolls, and perhaps even a capsarius — a servant to carry his school supplies. Imagine having someone attend class and take notes for you! Later in life, Cicero did just that, hiring his enslaved secretary, Tiro, to take dictation in shorthand. You could say he managed to outsource his homework after all.

Fast forward two millennia, and students now tote sleek laptops instead of wax tablets. But one thing hasn’t changed: the tech you carry still signals status. School has always been a social arena, where cool gear gives you a boost — whether it's the latest MacBook or a particularly fine stylus.

When it came to staying in touch with home, Cicero would’ve envied our instant messages and video calls. He once received a letter from Syria after 27 days. Imagine waiting over a month to hear from your mom! In an age of TikToks and texts, we forget that “mail” once meant a horse and a lot of hope. But even then, students grumbled about slow replies from home.


Gossip, Reputation, and Parental Oversight

Classrooms, ancient or modern, are more than places to learn — they’re breeding grounds for gossip. Horace took pride in avoiding slander and credited his father’s watchful parenting for keeping him out of trouble. “He guarded my innocence,” Horace wrote, recalling the day his father walked him to school. It turns out campus rumors aren’t a modern invention. Back then, a clever insult could be scribbled on a wax tablet and passed around — the Roman equivalent of a subtweet.

Horace’s father understood the risks of student life. He personally escorted young Horace to class and even sat in on lessons to shield him from bad influences. Today’s parents may not accompany their kids to lectures, but they show up at orientation, worry about safety, and dream big for their children’s future — often hoping they’ll be the first in the family to earn a college degree.

Horace’s father, once enslaved, dared to give his son a gentleman’s education — a radical act that still resonates. Like many modern parents, he saw learning as a way out, a step up, and a gateway to independence. And just like today, a student’s reputation mattered. Horace was proud no one could accuse him of greed or debauchery. Maintaining a good name was as vital in the Roman Republic as it is on today’s campuses — whether through whispered rumors or viral posts.


Rhetoric, Romance, and the Eternal Student Struggle

No PowerPoint? No problem. Roman students like Horace and Cicero gave speeches from memory — a high-pressure task that trained them for life in politics or public service. Rhetorical exercises were central to elite education, and being able to speak on the fly was the gold standard. Public speaking still makes palms sweat today, even if we now have slides and teleprompters to lean on.

Of course, student life isn’t all essays and exams. Horace’s poetry often reveals a heart caught up in love. In one Ode, he daydreams about a faithful lover — a glimpse into his emotional world that feels all too familiar. You can practically picture him in Athens, juggling crushes and classwork, trying to become a famous poet while nursing heartbreak.

Sound familiar? Modern students are still navigating late-night study sessions and love lives. Whether it’s a classmate who catches your eye or a messy breakup during finals week, the collision of romance and responsibility is timeless. Horace’s longing for a girl under the porticoes of Athens mirrors the modern dilemma: chase your dreams, but don’t flunk out while doing it.

And outside the classroom, Horace dabbled in extracurriculars — namely, writing poetry and briefly serving in Brutus’s army after Caesar’s assassination. Today’s students join clubs or advocate for causes. The urge to make a difference while balancing coursework? Eternal.


Changing Times, Timeless Traditions

So, what’s really changed since the days of Horace and Cicero? Scale, diversity, and freedom. Roman schools were small and socially exclusive. Today’s universities welcome students from all backgrounds, cultures, and genders — a scale and inclusivity Rome never imagined.

Freedom of choice has also evolved. In Horace’s time, education often locked students into a career path chosen by their family. Poet Ovid famously griped that his dad wanted him to be a lawyer — but he just wanted to write. Horace, too, chose poetry over politics, thanks to support from his patron Maecenas. It was a risky move, akin to turning down med school to join a garage band — but it was his dream.

Marriage expectations? Also very different. Rome pushed young adults into arranged marriages that served economic or political interests. Horace avoided that trap and remained a bachelor — even as Augustus tried to legislate marriage into fashion Horace managed to avoid that fate – he never married, remaining a bachelor with no kids. (Suetonius reports that Augustus Caesar passed laws against bachelorhood, essentially nudging men like Horace to marry and produce heirs, but Horace still did his own thing). Today, we marry (or don’t) on our own timeline. Education now symbolizes personal freedom rather than civic obligation.

Still, the heart of school life beats with familiar rhythms. Students today, like Horace and Cicero before them, juggle studies and social lives, battle homesickness, crave independence, chase ambition — and occasionally fall in love. Whether you’re writing verses in Latin or pulling an all-nighter in Python, you’re part of a tradition as old as civilization itself.


Same Human Story. Different Tools.

Clay tablets have become iPads, scrolls replaced by PDFs, and letters by instant messages. But the student experience — learning, laughing, gossiping, dreaming — remains remarkably unchanged. Horace and Cicero might raise an eyebrow at modern campuses, but they'd surely recognize the thrill, stress, and promise of student life.

Two thousand years on, we’re still trying to get to class on time, still trying to find our voice, and still wondering if the person three rows down might text us back.

Works Cited (MLA):

  • Cicero, Marcus Tullius. Letters to Atticus, translated by E. O. Winstedt. Gutenberg Project, 1921. (Letter of Aug. 15, 47 BC, showing a 27-day transit of a letter).

  • “Cicero.” NumberAnalytics Blog, 28 May 2025, pp. 1–3. (Early life of Cicero: wealthy equestrian family, top education).

  • Horace. Satires I.6, c. 35 BC. (Horace on school: wealthy kids with tablets; his father’s protective guidance).

  • Horace – Biography. Academy of American Poets, Poets.org. (Horace’s background: son of a freedman; finest school in Rome by Orbilius).

  • “Horace: The Son of a Slave Who Became Rome’s Leading Poet.” World History Encyclopedia, edited by Donald L. Wasson, World History Encyclopedia, 2020. (Horace’s later life: patronage of Maecenas; remained unmarried despite Augustus’s law).

  • New York Public Library Digital Collections, The Miriam and Ira D. Wallach Division of Art, Prints and Photographs: Print Collection. Horace. 1800-1910.

  • “Ovid.” World History Encyclopedia, edited by Donald L. Wasson, 2017. (Ovid’s early life: father urged him toward law and politics over poetry).

  • “Roman Education.” World History Encyclopedia, World History Publishing, 2019. (Overview of Roman schooling: students’ equipment, use of slaves, rhetorical exercises).

  • Tiro, Marcus Tullius. Wikipedia, Wikimedia Foundation, last modified Jan. 2023. (Cicero’s secretary Tiro and his duties: taking dictation, managing correspondence)

1.6.24

Stage Fright Dreams: Luis Buñuel & Performance Anxiety

Exploring stage-fright dreams, Buñuel's surreal dinner scene, and the fear of being caught unprepared in life's grand performance. Dive in now!
Luis Buñuel’s 1972 film, The Discreet Charm of the Bourgeoisie
I often have a recurring dream where I’m thrust onto a stage with no warning. Someone hands me a script or whispers lines from the wings, but no matter how hard I try, I can’t remember what to say. Sometimes I wander onstage at the wrong moment, sometimes I’ve had no rehearsal at all. If you’ve ever had this dream, you know that mix of panic and embarrassment—the feeling of being caught unprepared in front of an audience.

It’s a fairly common dream, one that makes me think of Shakespeare’s famous line: “All the world’s a stage, and all the men and women merely players.” At some level, maybe we all worry about “getting caught in the act”—of not performing our life’s roles correctly.

This fear of being exposed is brilliantly captured in Luis Buñuel’s 1972 film, The Discreet Charm of the Bourgeoisie. A staple of the Criterion Collection, it’s considered a classic of surrealist and absurdist cinema, and for good reason. Buñuel, who was associated with Salvador Dalí and other surrealists, loved to toy with social conventions, exposing them as both necessary and utterly absurd.

One scene in particular hits home for me. A group of bourgeois friends sits down to dinner in a strange, empty space—like an abandoned theater. Suddenly, there’s a persistent knocking sound. The confused dinner guests discover, to their horror, that a curtain has risen behind them, revealing a full audience. Someone off to the side tries to feed them lines, but they’ve forgotten their cues. In a neat twist, it turns out to be one character’s dream—an unsettling realization that resonates perfectly with my own recurring nightmare.

Watching that scene gives me a weird kind of solace. It’s Buñuel’s cinematic reflection of the universal anxiety that we’ll someday find ourselves onstage—caught without our lines, exposed as frauds. And yet, there’s something comical and liberating about it, too: the laughter we feel when we realize that maybe we’re all just fumbling through our parts together.

So thank you, Buñuel, for capturing in film what I’ve so often experienced in my sleep. Sometimes all you can do is wake up, laugh at the whole performance, and carry on—until the next time the red curtain rises.
***
I hope reading my blog post helps to convey a dream’s recurring nature and the link to Buñuel’s classic surrealist moment. Let me know what you think! Like my content—find my humanities based lesson plans on TpT

5.1.24

Things in My Type ‘B’ Classroom that just Makes Sense

Welcome to 'Things in My Type ‘B’ Classroom that Just Makes Sense,' a unique exploration of the unconventional yet harmonious world of a Type B classroom. In this post, we delve into the charmingly unorganized library, the intriguing 'Random Bowls,' and the essential first aid kit, each element artfully contributing to the distinctiveness of our learning environment. 
Discover how these seemingly haphazard items are not merely decorative but integral to our educational fabric, fostering an atmosphere of discovery and engagement. Join us as we celebrate the eclectic and purposeful arrangement that defines the spirit of a Type B classroom, where every item has a story and every corner a lesson.

In my Type Two classroom, a charmingly unorganized library coexists with a ‘Random Bowl’ and a first aid kit, nestled beside another ‘Random Bowl.’ Each element, though appearing haphazard, subtly underscores the distinctiveness of a Type B classroom. Here, an assorted collection of items isn’t just decorative; they’re integral, seamlessly weaving into the fabric of our learning space. This arrangement fosters an atmosphere where eclectic, unconventional elements find harmony and purpose, enhancing the sense of discovery and engagement in our educational journey.

13.3.23

Meme: Ross Matthews and Otho Share an Uncanny Resemblance

Do Ross Matthews of Ru Paul’s Drag Race fame and the character Otho from the 1988 movie Beetlejuice (played by Glenn Shadix) share an uncanny resemblance? I think so. Share if you agree. 
Ross Matthews and Otho are in the image against a purple background with Ru Paul and the sand snake from Beetlejuice
Memes We'd Love to See: © 2023 Stones of Erasmus
If we take a closer look at Ross Matthews and Otho's appearance, it's hard not to see the resemblance. Both have a similar facial structure, a prominent chin, and an expressive gaze that instantly draws you in. Ross Matthews is famous for his role as a judge on Ru Paul's Drag Race, where he has become a fan favorite for his endearing personality and quick wit. Meanwhile, Otho, portrayed by the late Glenn Shadix, is a character in the 1988 Tim Burton-directed film Beetlejuice. Otho is an interior designer who helps the ghostly couple who haunts a house to scare off the new living inhabitants.

While Ross Matthews is a real person and Otho is a fictional character, the idea that they could exist in the same movie universe is more plausible than it seems. Both Tim Burton-directed movies and Ru Paul's Drag Race are known for their campy, colorful, and often outrageous aesthetics. In fact, the idea of a drag queen and a flamboyantly styled interior designer crossing paths in a fantastical cinematic universe would make for an entertaining and hilarious movie.

Whether or not Ross Matthews' and Otho's similarities are intentional or coincidental, it's still fun to imagine the two coexisting in a shared universe. As pop culture enthusiasts, we can't help but look for hidden connections between our favorite shows and movies. And who knows, maybe we'll see Ross Matthews and Otho team up for an unforgettable adventure that will leave us laughing and cheering from start to finish.

19.8.22

Photos Taken Near the Bronx River and Two Stories About New York City from Louisianians

In this post, I ask two family members from Louisiana to give their impressions of New York City. These are their responses.

Stylized photograph of the author
In this photograph, I am
waiting for the Q44 bus in the Bronx,
right next to the Bronx River.

A New York City subway train traverses the Bronx River.
A New York City subway train
traverses the Bronx River.
When I asked my school-aged nephew what he thought about New York, he replied: “I think that it's like very crowded and a lot of people like foods there and the best place is probably the pizza. And it's probably the best food. Thank you for your time, everybody.”


And then, I asked him to imagine what the city smelled like and felt like (using sensory details): “New York is fun and stinky and interesting, like a hot dog.”

When I asked my seventy-something-year-old aunt what people in Louisiana think about New York, she told me a story: “Greig, I would say they think it's too dangerous, but when I went to New York with Uncle Raymond in 1993, that's the only place that I was able to go out at night shopping. Even in New Orleans, even when we lived in Chalmette, I couldn't go out at night shopping. Oh my God. I forgot how many years ago. That was probably twenty-odd years ago. But in New York, I could go shopping. We had a hotel near Times Square, So I was able to go up and down that street without any restrictions in the middle of the night. Do you know? And, um, you know, I never go at night, and Uncle Raymond never let me go anyplace at night.”

Three kids walk past a bus stop In the Bronx.A sign advises against littering, but someone left an informative note.
Photos (L) Three kids walk past a bus stop In the Bronx. (R) A sign advises against littering, but someone left an informative note.

6.4.22

POV: Counting Time as a School Secretary (If You Are Seated at the Front Desk)

In this post, I articulate the unique perspective a school secretary has on the inner workings of a school.
Point-of-View: The Main Hallway of a School as Seen by the School Secretary
Ms. Lauren Yandow walks down the main hallway
with her kindergarteners and
waves to the school secretary.
School secretaries have a unique insight into how the inner workings of a school function, allowing them incredible insight that few other people can even begin to fathom. Sitting at the front desk during the school day is almost like being immersed in an ever-flowing river of students — it's fascinating! Each passing moment brings new surprises and never fails to remind you just how diverse and vibrant life at each school can be.

16.9.21

Why I Love TikTok Content Creators (And So Should You)—And a List of Zany TikToks I Found

I have a penchant for the theatrical. 
The dime novel. The beauty in the absurd. The homemade movie. The guy with the camera turned on himself. The take-a-household-item-and-make-a-prop kind of performativity. 

You get the gist.

And where can you find the most beautiful schlock the Internet has ever created? Why go no further than TikTok. It's a platform where content creators put their own identities front and center — and it's a highly satisfying romp.

If you didn't know — TikTok is a mobile video app owned by the Chinese company ByteDance. The first iteration of the app was dubbed Musical.ly, authored by software Engineers Alex Zhu and Luyu Yang. Basically, the app began as a lip syncing app called Musical.ly and its companion live streaming app called live.ly. TikTok was a rebrand of the app that attempted to fold both features of the two social apps into one.

And the rest is history. 

Just as Twitter revolutionized the short writing form of 265 characters, TikTok has ushered in the micro-length video form of 15 to 30 seconds.

The draw of TikTok is twofold — it’s easy to use and to create content with, coupled with its immense sound and music library and its unending filter library. However, the best TikToks have neither — they’re pure spun dioramas of peoples constructed private lives. And it’s why I first was enamored of the platform — peering into people’s live created in a dizzying array of quick action theater of the absurd. 

Here are some gems I’ve collected along the way. 

1. The Smiling, Waving Homage to The Sitcom Montage
This teen has an instinctual appreciation for the visual grammar of the iconic television sitcom montage — ignore the silly tune — and pay attention to how his edits match perfectly something out of American television classics Growing Pains or Family Ties.

2. Antoinette's Casual Use of the Cigarette
It’s easy to dismiss @antoniteegrams because her videos are riffs on soundbytes. But she’s so humble in her mien and I love her casual use of the cigarette. I have no idea what the original source of the soundbyte is but that’s what makes TikTok endearing. Any random noise can be strewn into actor’s gold. Andy Warhol was partly right — in the future everyone will be famous — but not just for five minutes, but for as long as you have working Internet and a smartphone with a halfway decent camera.

3. The Family Dinner Table is Often a Suitable Mise-en-Scene
@eddiepdoyle videos his grandmother’s acerbic comebacks in dozens of video. TikTok has made many folks Internet famous because a cousin, or grandson, or daughter, or someone, picked up a camera and started candidly filming a family member. The immediacy of the moment is right at your fingertips, as if you’ve stumbled into this woman’s cluttered kitchen and she wants to know what you want from her. Classic.

4. A Colorful Edit

It’s possible that this edit is rather basic. But it's relatively early TikTok. I like the use of color and fashion and the sheer fact that the guy is having a lot of fun. And that's quite a mess for one less-than-thirty-second video.

5. Boys Wear Tee-Shirts on Their Heads When They Play a Girl
So teenage boys on TikTok will don a tee-shirt on their head when they're playing a female role. It's sheer schlock. But a testament to the fact that no TikTok star has a wardrobe warehouse or access to MGM studios. Although, it is odd that teenage boys think a woman's hair is well represented by donning a tee on their head. Oh, girl!

6. Sissy That Walk!
If you can't get on the runway, girl you better werk. So does this amazing runway walk that is probably this TikToker's backyard. Sissy that walk!

7. The Five Minute Bathroom Break 
TikTok lends a view into working class jobs — fast food attendants, nail salonists, customer service representatives, and the lot. One thing network television cannot do — even though it has tried with shows like All in the Family and Roseanne — is replicate the experience of an everyday American's day at work. And often that means taking a five minute bathroom break and talking to the mirror. Period.

8. Right?!
I am not sure what to think of this video. Brilliant? Yes.

9. The Smiling Boy
This boy has created an entire fandom over the fact that he is a teenager who enjoys smiling.

10. The Histrionic School Lunch Lady Performance
Again put a piece of fabric on your head and all of a sudden you are a woman. And I wouldn't even call this drag. I call it histrionic performativity. And I didn't steal that from Judith Butler.

11. It's Got To Be the Sweater
It could be ironic that this guy is wearing a Playboy sweater. Right?! Multiple Tik-Toks are created by people, mostly teenagers, who are bored. And lots of TikTokers were born out of the Covid-19 pandemic.

12. The Best Comedian is Probably Your Neighbor, Mr. Pickles
Again — the beauty of TikTok is that it creates stars out of ordinary people. I love this guy's vulnerability and authenticity all packaged into a nice, yellowy-orangey color scheme.

11.4.21

A Paean to Payphones (And Why I Feel Nostalgic for Old School Telecommunication)

When is the last time you used a working payphone? How sure are you that you can find one if your mobile phone goes dead? Do you have a quarter in your pocket?

Payphone in New York City Subway Station
Found a working payphone in the
Times Square / 42nd Street Station in New York City

Nostalgia is dangerous. Start feeling nostalgia, and suddenly, everything in the present is suspect. "Oh, I remember the days when you had to call someone on a landline."

But I like it when old-school technology still persists. I don't want to return to using payphones. They are clunky (and who has change, anyway?). And just when the conversation gets good, you have to add another quarter to continue the call.

You can find a working payphone in a few subway stations, strip malls, maybe a gas station in Duluth?

I used a payphone recently. I cannot remember why. It was when I was traveling. My phone was dead. I think it was in an Amtrak station (which I feel like is where I would find a working payphone).

Ironically, the school where I work has a payphone in the main hallway. But it does not work. It just hangs there on the wall. Hundreds of people walk by it. Heck. I didn't even notice it until like two years working at the school. I think it will become an art installation. Soon.

Fun fact: Payphones still exist. And one in five of them are in New York City! The Federal Communications Commission still regulates payphones. They still maintain a tip guide for using them and not get scammed when using a calling card. Remember those?

When was the last time you used a payphone?

PDF Copy for Printing

5.1.21

Storytime: Anthony’s First Day at Kindergarten

In this post, I retell a story of when I was in kindergarten and told my teacher I was named Anthony. 
When I was in kindergarten, I told my teacher to call me Anthony—chaos followed. Watch my hilarious story!
On the first day of school in kindergarten. 
My teacher, Mrs. Rousell, does the roll call. “Susie, Anthony.” And, of course, my first name is Anthony, but I’ve always gone by Greig. So in a split second, I say, “Yeah, my name is Anthony. Don’t call me Greig.” So the rest of that week, the teacher says, “One plus one, Anthony, what’s one plus one?” I’m like looking around the room. Is she talking to me? I don’t answer her.

And then later on in the day, “Where’s your mat? Anthony, go get your mat for nap time.” I’m like, “What?! Is she talking to me?” I mean, this goes on for the entire week, and finally, on Friday, my mother comes barging into my room. 

“Anthony!”

I got in so much trouble, honey. Yes! My mama was like, “Why do you call that teacher and tell her that your name is Anthony? She says you have a hearing problem. Don’t you know that your ‘Greig’”? I mean, come on.

17.11.20

Video Repost: Teen Entrepreneurs Start Their Own Trash Bin Cleaning Service Called The Wash Broz

In this post, I advertise two teen entrepreneurs willing to be hired to wash your dirty trash bins to make them sparkle.
Two Dallas, Texas teens offer a unique and exciting service — cleaning your trash bins! They use the latest products and techniques to ensure that all of your bins sparkle. Contact them today at 972-674-0043 and follow their progress on Instagram @washbroz. Let these two entrepreneurs take care of your bin cleaning needs, so you don't have to!
Video Credit: @washbroz

12.1.19

Video Repost: Braden Gives His Bubblegum Book Report in Season One of the Mickey Mouse Club Reboot (circa 1990s)

I was never a fan of the Mickey Mouse Club reboot on the Disney Channel - mainly, because I am not sure if we had the Disney Channel in my house or not (I honestly cannot remember). However, I came upon this trite little gem - it's a cute little skit - and it reminds me of the innocence I recall from circa 1990s television craziness. I cannot put my finger on it - but television in the 1990s was just plain cotton candy madness. It was sweet - and totally unreeled from any kind of substantial aesthetic. I love how the above skit takes place on a stage with a live audience - kind of like how Nickelodeon did its shows back in the day - and a kind of tween version of Saturday Night Live. Now. I love how the girl gives her sterling report on Moby Dick. Great job. But why does she give an apple for the teacher - isn't that a bribe? And then comes Braden's report - one of the stars of the early reboot days of The Mickey Mouse Club. His report rings true for me - because I can remember a classmate pulled a similar stunt in a class once. He tried to give a class report on one of the elements of the periodic table and he passed out a brochure he had made with the name of the element printed on it - he was so proud of his ersatz report that I remember it still to this day. I guess it is the same for our man Braden. I would remember his report - and he gives it with such Americana teen bravado that I was surprised that the teacher was scowling. And in a kind of teen rebellion-cum-audience mob effect - the live action crowd is totally into it. Go Braden! A+

6.7.18

Advice on Friendship from Charlotte's Web

“The quickest way to spoil a friendship is to wake somebody up in the morning before he is ready.”

- Charlotte, from Charlotte's Web by E.B. White

4.7.18

The American Holiday The Fourth of July (Alternatively, Independence Day)

On a hike in the New York Catskills, I came upon a mountain laurel (Kalmia Latifolia).
Mountain Laurel (Kalmia Latifolia) I found
on a hiking trail in the Catskills.
As I sit on my tuffet (a hard, wooden chair I use as my writing chair), I raise a glass of ice-cold filtered water poured from a bonafide Brita dispenser, and make a few stray comments:
***
  • It is hot, and humid in New York City. I hope you have air-conditioning - if not, get yourself to a New York City cooling center.
  • I am thinking of setting off some fireworks in the middle of the street and yelling, "I am from Louisiana!"
  • Nationalism is deeply taught in this country so I find myself humming patriotic tunes and feeling nostalgic about the colors red, white, and blue.
  • Last year, I did stake out a spot in Sunset Park with my buddy Anthony Charles to watch the Macy's Fireworks display.
  • This year, supposedly, I could go to Long Island City - but I am thinking of just staying home and watching BBC adaptations of Terry Pratchett novels.

28.2.17

Adult/Teenager Banter in Manchester by the Sea

Production still from Manchester by the Sea (© 2016 Amazon Studios)
Nephew Patrick and Uncle Eddie squabble in Manchester by the Sea © 2016 Amazon Studios
I must admit one film that slipped by me was Manchester by the Sea - produced by Amazon Studios and a contender in the 2016 awards season. 

The movie is good and it has lots of witty examples of adult/teenager banter. I can see why it won an award at the Oscars for its writing.

Underneath the banter between Casey Affleck's character and his on-screen nephew, lies a serious and moving story. However, it's a hilarious movie even though it is about a man who is wracked with guilt over the accidental death of his three children and who is now faced with the prospect of raising his teenage nephew. For example, the conversations between Patrick, the nephew, who just lost his father, and his Uncle Eddie (Casey Affleck) are well-written and funny. A recurring string of dialogue is the nephew's hilarious pointed questions that undermine his Uncle's crotchety humanism - and poke fun at his complete lack of social aplomb. 

At one point a stranger overhears the two arguing. He says something critical - like, "Good parenting," and Uncle Eddie - as he does throughout this movie when he perceives a slight to his character - goes ballistic and Patrick tries to defuse the situation and then, hilariously, whips around and says "Uncle Eddie, are you fundamentally unsound?" and, later, "Are you brain damaged?"

Here is another funny exchange - but this time it is Uncle Eddie. He tells Patrick that "if you're going to freak out every time that you see a frozen chicken I think we should go to the hospital."
#funny

26.8.16

Theater of the Absurd Charlie Rose Style

Charlie Rose supercut
In 2013 I saw this video at an exhibition on supercuts at the Museum of the Moving Image in Queens  adjacent to the old style Astoria film studios where Law and Order and Sesame Street have been brought to life.
Anyway. A supercut is a kind of new media -- someone gets an idea like "What if I cut out everything in news media clippings of Donald Trump speaking except for when he utters "China"? You get the idea. Or a supercut of just blah blah blahs from across cinematic history. I posted that one on this blog. I must be obsessed with supercuts. I have wanted to create my own but never had the tenacity nor have I yet lighted upon a good idea.

This supercut from the Charlie Rose show was imagined as "if written by Samuel Beckett." By just paring down an episode on technology to a few buzzwords and phrases the creator has managed to create a nonsensical interview with Charlie Rose and himself. Here it is.

True story: I now utter "Google" nonsensically in public places. Thank you very much.

"Charlie Rose" by Samuel Beckett from Andrew Filippone Jr. on Vimeo.
Media Credit: Andrew Filippone, Jr.

20.7.15

L is for "Lying Prone on the Floor at Manhattan Mini Storage"

Greig Roselli fishes out a key with a rule from under the locked door of a storage locker..
Looking like a bible salesman 
who lost the key to his storage locker, 
I lie prone on the floor of the Manhattan Min-Storage.
How I was locked out of a storage locker and fished out the key with a ruler:

Lisa told me to ferret the key out with a flat ruler. It didn't work! And we needed to get in! Can you tell I'm opening this post like the beginning of a badly written situation comedy?

Feeling like a cartoon character, I got prone on the floor vainly fishing out the key to our storage locker. Am I a bible salesman trying to get my Gideon bibles? Or maybe I'm a bootlegger and this maximum-security storage locker holds my gin. Or maybe it's a year's worth of three-hundred-paged-glossy-covered coupon books —those artless tomes filled with fifty percent discounts for edible arrangements and vacation cruises. Mostly sold by high schoolers raising money for track and field. Or some other kind of extra-curricular activity.

5.4.14

Jesus Was A Slacker

Jesus was not considered Dean's List material in his home country of Palestine. He irked the professors of his day with his youthful sarcasm and basically failed his exam and was kicked out of the synagogue (Luke 4:28-29). He picked up the pieces and eventually became known as a great orator  giving first-rate parables only a Literature professor could love. That's courage.
image source: funny jesus

1.4.14

Why the Scarecrow is Boss (Even Though He Doesn't Have a Brain)

Did you know that in the original Oz books, the Scarecrow is named the ruler of Oz?

How Can You Talk If You Haven't A Brain?
In the original novels by L. Frank Baum, even though the Scarecrow lacks a brain, he is named Ruler of Oz! Take that Dorothy, and your little dog too. In the classic 1939 MGM movie he gets an honorary degree from the Wizard, and in the 1978 Michael Jackson version, his genius is in the song “You Can’t Win” where he reminds us “to refuel our brains.” I love a guy with no brains.
image source (GIF): pandawhale

11.2.14

Photograph: "Talking Out Loud"

South Brooklyn, Winter 2014

I am from South Louisiana, so, growing up, I did not have much experience with snowfall. If and when it did snow, the flakes came down in softy, dramatic drops. I remember the front yard of our house blanketed in a thin layer of papery whiteness, almost as if mother nature had covered the earth with a spider-web of flakes. So — living in the northeast, I become a bit giddy during a decent snowfall. Donning a winter coat, and a cap (I seldom wear gloves unless it is bitterly cold), I take long walks. South Brooklyn has a park — Sunset Park — and it is the closest patch of green space near my apartment. I talk out loud, thinking through ideas. When I am in a rut, I have to take a walk. Otherwise, I will just sit in a stew. This "stuckness" mostly alights when I have to plan a lesson or do something creative with a deadline attached. So off I go to perambulate so I can come back home and get down to business.

30.10.13

How To Toast Bread


Bryce Chartwell shows the people how to toast bread.

A friend sent me this video. His media studies professor used it as an example of narcissism. If I had to make toast for Bryce Chartwell I would be afraid to mess up the toast! What if I don't do it the right way? This video makes me want to eat toast in the opposite way: over a rough fire, scarf it down, and get my shirt dirty. If it is satire, this video is hilarious. I think it's satire and a good example of consumerism. We don't just want toast. We want the perfect toast. And we are satisfied with the illusion that spreading the butter in an East to West direction and making sure the butter is only one micron thick will achieve satisfaction beyond the basic needs of food and shelter into the meta-realm of desire where toast takes on an entirely different meaning. It ain't toast anymore. It reminds me of people who order specially bottled water at restaurants to feel like the water, in all of its neat packaging is more than just water, it is beyond water. Of course, the structure of desire is such that we are never satisfied. We want more. And more. Capitalism takes advantage of our desire and runs with it. Long live the toast. The toast is dead.